Towards Eden, an Enneagram Podcast

#21 - Name What's Working

• Elyse Regier

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January energy is bonkers 🤯  Before we jump into goal-setting and habit-building, can we find more contentment by simply recognizing what's already working for us? 

Inspired by Kendra Adachi, the Lazy Genius, I take a step back from the crazy pressure of new year resolutions to name what's already working.

This episode is inspired by The Lazy Genius Podcast, episode #399.  

The Lazy Genius  #399 - Name What’s Working

“The Plan” by Kendra Adachi

Instagram reel - Kendra talks about naming what’s working 

Heather Robertson’s free strength training program




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Speaker 1:

It is drumroll the last week of January, whoa. I'm taking a little break from regular podcast episodes and today I'm sharing a mini episode about naming what's working. My favorite author and podcaster is Kendra Adachi. She's also known as the Lazy Genius. She did a podcast episode a few weeks back about naming what's working.

Speaker 1:

I really like this concept. This month, we've been living in the midst of unhinged new year energy. We feel like we have a fresh slate that we can put anything on. We feel like we can slash, should make new goals and new habits, etc. Etc. And oh yeah, the advertising. The advertising is all trying to convince us to improve ourselves and crush our goals. By the way, speaking of ads, have you guys seen these car commercials? This was mostly like November and December car commercials, but these car commercials are trying to tell us that all we need to do to not be running late to things is to get a faster car. Yeah, I really like those commercials. Sounds like that would definitely solve your problems. Just get a faster car. Okay, anyways, that was not in my script.

Speaker 1:

So the new year it's a crazy. New year energy it's all about convincing us to crush our goals and set new resolutions. So here's what Kendra the lazy genius says about that. She says what if we start by naming what's working? Name what's already working in your life. What's working Name what's already working in your life. So a lot of the lazy genius philosophy is pushing back against the idea that the goal of our lives is greatness. The goal of our lives is actually not greatness. This is what the lazy genius says. She cares about noticing what's good in our lives, right here and now. She reminds us it's actually okay to be content where we are. We don't always need to listen to the world telling us that we always need to push for what's next or what's better or what's going to make us great. She has a new book out called the Plan, about compassionate time management for women, and it is so refreshing. Like I, I felt my soul grow lighter as I read her words, the words in this book. It was really remarkable. So I highly recommend that book, the Plan, especially if you feel like you're drowning in the goals and resolutions culture, which I often feel like that. So in the goals and resolutions culture, which I often feel like that. So I'll put a link to that book and also a link to Kendra's podcast episode on this topic and I think, like this topic is relevant for, especially for certain Enneagram numbers.

Speaker 1:

I'm a one, but I'm also thinking like type threes, who feel like they always need to keep pushing and achieving, and type twos, you guys feel like you always need to be on for your people and you always need to be meeting everybody's needs, and a lot of our worth and identity can be tied to these things, these performance things, and so I want to talk more about naming what's working. This, to me, it sort of feels like it's a cousin to gratitude naming what's working. So how could it make us feel to name what's already working in our lives now, before we jump to creating all the new habits and goals and pushing ourselves into this new and improved imaginary future version of ourselves? Of course, setting goals and creating new habits are great and they can be so helpful and they can be good for us in certain seasons, but it can just be helpful to have a foundation of wait. What am I already thankful for and can I find contentment with some of the rhythms that are already in my life, and can I find contentment with some of the rhythms that are already in my life? So, okay, I'm going to explore what is working in my life. So I'm going to do this process name what's working, what's been working in this past couple months of my life, in this season that I'm in, before I jump to setting my new goals. Here's what's working for me.

Speaker 1:

Number one reading fiction before bed. Okay, I love reading. I was recently going through some of my storage bins from when I was a kid and I just found like journal entries of myself at eight years old talking about how much I love reading. And I found these books that I read when I was a kid and I'm just really thankful that in the past couple of years I've been reconnecting with that part of myself that just really loves to read for pleasure. And here's why I try to make it specific reading fiction before bed.

Speaker 1:

And the reason I chose fiction is because I I like the idea of reading nonfiction. I like reading a lot of topics of nonfiction books that I think would be really great for me to read and I could learn so much. But I really have been struggling lately with finishing nonfiction books. I do not have that problem with fiction. With fiction I can run right through it, stay really engaged in the plot. So when I'm trying to find something to read before bed, nonfiction is not relaxing to me. It kind of just makes me feel like I'm working and fiction just makes me feel like I'm having fun, if that makes sense. And, yeah, I go through the phases with my phone of I need to keep my phone in a different room while I sleep, but then the next week I'm like no, I need to play my game as I fall asleep because I'm addicted to being on my phone screen. So I think reading fiction is something that can like compete compete with that that pull that my phone has on my brain. So I think reading fiction before bed is like my is my top choice in this season of what I do to fall asleep, and it's been working.

Speaker 1:

And here's another thing that's been working Listening to an audio book while I work out. Working out is really important to me. It is important to me to take care of my body and to do exercises that I enjoy, which currently is just strength training videos. I use Heather Robertson's free training programs on YouTube, but lately I've like been getting bored. It's like if I go, if I pass that 20 minute mark, which most of the workouts I do are like 30 to 40 minutes. Then I'm like getting bored and feel like I don't want to finish. So I started putting in my earbuds and listening to an audio book that I really like again a fiction audio book while I work out, and that is kind of keeping me from getting bored and like quitting my workouts halfway through. We could dive deep into ADHD and other things that are affecting why I get bored while I'm working out, but we'll just leave it at. What's working is listening to an audio book while I work out. So I'm just going, but we'll just leave it at. What's working is listening to an audiobook while I work out. So I'm just going to keep doing that until it doesn't work anymore.

Speaker 1:

Number three thing that is working Soup-er Mondays. Do you love that name? It is so silly. I originally said I'm going to start cooking soup on Mondays and every Monday in this winter season I will make soup for dinner and it's just decided. Then we'll have soup leftovers. And then Brayden said oh, we should call it Super Mondays. And I was like well, yeah, of course we're definitely going to call it Super Mondays. So every Monday I make soup and it's fun because then during the week. I'm like keeping an eye out for new soup recipes that would be fun to try, and then I don't have to make a lot of decisions on Sunday and Monday about what we're going to eat at the beginning of the week. So name what's working. Soup Mondays is definitely working.

Speaker 1:

So then, if I wanted to take this list and, you know, actually make goals from it, I did have.

Speaker 1:

I did have a book reading goal for January.

Speaker 1:

I wanted to read six fiction books. Okay, so that's, that was my goal. But that was built on this foundation of okay, I'm already reading fiction every night before bed, so it should be pretty easy to complete that goal because I already have this system in place that's been working. So I don't know, it felt like I wasn't adding this unattainable goal. It was something that made sense with my current lifestyle. So I tried to start making a list of like, how do you name what's working for each Enneagram type? But honestly, that didn't really work out because this is like, so personalized to everybody's lifestyle, it's not really something that correlates to Enneagram type. So it's very personal, based on each person, not based on each person's type. So I hope that you can think of one or two things that are working in your life. If you do like to set new goals and create new habits, that is great. Go for it. I'm happy for you. I have a few for myself. But also don't forget about the good things that are already working, and I also think this can help our mindset. We know the scientists say that gratitude is good for your brain, so maybe this process is also something that would be good for your brain before you start making all of your goals.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to end this episode with a list of things I love about being friends with each Enneagram. Type Ones you guys work so hard for the people you love. Enneagram twos they notice that something is wrong before we even notice it ourselves. Type threes cheer us on and want us to be the best we can be. You can always find a good cheerleader in your three friends. Fours sit with us in our pain and they tell us the truth. Fives help us understand the world around us more. Sixes keep us safe and help us think things through. Sevens remind us of the good things in life. Eights are loyal and always have our backs.

Speaker 1:

Nines make us feel seen and heard without judgment and before I knew the Enneagram. I got easily upset when I found that people weren't like me. Or if people weren't reacting the same way I was or doing things differently, I would just get upset by that. But now I really value our differences and I know that I could not live such a full and abundant life without them, without having this diversity of personalities in my life. So what Enneagram number are you especially thankful for this week? Think about it, maybe send that person a text, tell them what you appreciate about them. So that is all for today. I'm going to take a couple more weeks off and then later, towards the end of February, I'll be back with some more interviews, some more full-length episodes, and I cannot wait to keep learning with you.